Doing my favorite thing – loving my family!

God is into relationships.

In fact, contrary to common misperceptions of God or ‘religion’, one can safely say that with God, it is all about relationships.  God our heavenly Father is like our earthly fathers in that He desires to protect and provide for us.  Our entire purpose for existing is to know Him (and make Him known).  Relationships.

This knowing is the intimacy that Zan Tyler speaks of in Chapter 3 of her book 7 Tools for Cultivating Your Child’s Potential.  Won’t you join us over at The Pelsers as we discuss how this chapter spoke to our hearts?

Human beings are designed to need intimacy, not only with God but with other humans.  I learned {and witnessed} in my college days majoring in psychology that if an infant is not held, cuddled, nurtured physically he or she will ‘fail-to-thrive’ – quite literally fail to grow in a physical sense.

I believe there are more subtle lacks of intimacy common in our world today that, though they aren’t as dramatically apparent as stunted physical growth, can drastically affect spiritual and emotional growth of our children.

A lack of strong, fulfilling relationships during a child’s life can {and often does} result in depression and other anxiety disorders.  How can we, as parents, provide the kind of active, engaging and vibrant relationships that our kids need to nurture them and cultivate a empowered sense of identity?

The Importance of Personal Presence

Zan speaks of the importance of physical touch.  More subtle is the need for the physical, personal presence.  Looking to Jesus and His 12 disciples and how He walked by the way, teaching them in the true Deuteronomy 6:7 way.  He ministered to others, for sure, but He dedicated the majority of His time living with and walking with the twelve.

He taught by:

• example
• parable
• hands on experience
• lecture
• questioning

In our own day-to-day lives with our children, there will be many mundane tasks that we must perform they may even seem, at times, to drown out any lofty, spiritual pursuits or accomplishments.  Like tending a garden, tilling, planting, weeding, pruning – all come before the harvest.  The jewels are in there – it just takes work to nurture them to fruition.

The Day of ‘Yes’

I am blessed to be able, by God’s grace, to stay home with the last 6 of my 8 children.  I am with my kids all day, every day.  However, if I am not careful, I can begin to operate in my own bubble – directing the kids, managing them, while I attempt to ‘get things done’.  This way can have an appearance of success;  I am more peaceful and there are fewer interruptions and ‘inconveniences’.

I noticed this happening recently and during my early morning devotion time with the Lord, I asked God to help me ba more attentive and willing mom.  God was faithful to provide the way!

When opportunities to do things that the kids wanted to do arose, I stopped myself and the usual “No” response and said “Yes”.  What a day we had!

I took one child to the tire shop {even though I was hoping to get some writing done while I waited – alone} played Legos, just sat and watched one in need of being watched and generally kept an open mind to the desires and gentle callings of my kids.

About 9pm, my 5-year old son asked me to go outside with him on our trampoline – waaay out back mind you.  Not my cup of tea late at night {it was dark you know!}  This is normally something my husband does with the kids during the summer.  They have a wild rumpus of a time chasing and being chased.  This night, however, my husband was out-of-town.  I must admit, my son did have to ask several times before the Spirit nudged me and I acquiesced.

Blanket in hand and a trail of curious children behind us, we headed out…to an experience that could not have been planned in any curriculum or lesson plan.  The pure joy of hanging out together, lying on our backs looking up in wonder at the night sky.  We pointed out constellations, talked about how God holds the universe in His hands.  I told the story of my fearful night time sailing trip where I prayed and God showered the sky with shooting stars.  Only to witness one ourselves!

All this to say, take the time to ‘be’ with your children, moms.  You don’t have to do everything they want but ask the Spirit to lead you to do what is best.

And Jesus answered and said to her, “Martha, Martha, you are worried and troubled about many things.  But one thing is needed, and Mary has chosen that good part, which will not be taken away from her.  Luke 10:41-42

Linking up today with the 7 Tools Book Club:

Share and Enjoy